Wednesday, April 29, 2009

there is no magic hand

While that seems mighty obvious to everyone that there is no magic hand that just sweeps in and makes all you dreams come true, it gets to easy believe/hope that one might exist. After you've done the hard work of writing the book, you assume that you can just sit back and relax and someone will just take it from there.

And when then wasn't the case, my initial reaction was to sob and assume that there was something with wrong with me and give up. Somebody rejected me for a reason, and that reason must be that I'm the worst writer ever. I should never be allowed near the written word.

Is this true? Doubtful.

It wasn't until I saw Mark Hoppus giving advice to Pete Wentz about what up and coming kids needed to do in order make bands happen that it finally hit me. He worked his ass off to get where he was at, and he is far more charming than I am. Maybe better looking too. So again, I thought that it was easier for him.

And you know what? Maybe it was. But chances are, I'll never have to travel all over the desert in a van with two other hot sweaty dudes so people will read my book. I'll never be booed offstage. So there. I have some things going for me.

He said there was no magic hand. Making good songs (or writing a good book) is only a small part of the battle. And in the end, it's not even the most essential part. (I'm sure you've read and heard terrible things. You know being good isn't a requirement to getting an agent.) But I have a good book. So I'm already ahead of the game.

So for the past six months, I have been working my ass. I have been doing ever concieveable thing that can do. Starting with writing an actual good book that has a definable market. I've learned a lot. The most important thing is that I can't take it personal, I have to work hard, and pissing and moaning has never helped anybody with anything.

I have definitely grown up in the past six months, and that reflects both in my book and my work ethic. This WILL happen. It's only a matter of time, and I've got time. So here we go. I am my own magic hand.