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Friday, April 13, 2012

Australia 2.0

My gosh I love Australia. I probably love it more than any other place I've never been. In my mind, it is a magical land with insanely gorgeous reefs, unnaturally attractive people, and the most bizarre, awesome animals.

Did you know that the platypus is venomous? And something like 8 out of 10 of the world's most deadly spiders or ants or snakes live in Australia? (I watched a show on Animal Planet once where I learned this fact, and it was something that was poisonous, but I can't remember what anymore). If I recall correctly, there are a lot of poisonous animals in Australia though. And I think that's awesome.

I think that's what did it. Everything in Australia is clearly trying to kill everyone there. So it's some kind natural selection where only the truly awesome people can survive it. It's like a pressure cooker of amazingness.

Name one person from Australia that isn't awesome. Do it. I dare you. You can't. (Okay, there is that serial guy that I just watched a movie about, and some other douches I'm sure. No country is perfect. But I'm saying their "awesome" to "not awesome" ratio is staggering.)

That's why Australians always marry Australians. Even when they move to the United States (i.e. Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman). Americans can't live up to their awesomeness. It's a well known fact that's why Nicole Kidman's and Tom Cruise's marriage didn't work. People blame it on the Scientology, but it's really the Australian thing.

And in Australia, Daniel Johns is like a real celebrity, right? Not like here, where I go, "Hey, Daniel Johns is the neatest. Have you guys listened to Young Modern?" And then people have no idea what I'm talking about, and I get sad and go in my room to cuddle Young Modern and Diorama

(Related note - any word on his solo album? I'm stalking the internet for information, but last I'd heard he was working on. But that's it).

I'm following this guy on instagram now, and he's been taking all these stunning pictures of the Australian coast. I believe he's in Perth, but don't quote me on this. Anyway, it's insanely gorgeous. I look at his pictures every day, salivating over the magical splendor of it.

Plus, if that wasn't enough, the good folks in Australia have been doing a bananas job of promoting my books, and Australian readers have been incredibly welcoming. I really do need to thank all the people working in Australia to get my books out there, especially Dolly mag that was literally getting hundreds and hundreds of copies of Switched out there.

But there's really just icing on the cake. Even if you guys all hated my book, I would still love you.

I've blogged of my Australia love in the past, and apparently it was around this time last year. There must be something in the air that gets me in an Australia frenzy.

I saw Cabin in the Woods tonight (fairly awesome, made me laugh, had a couple jumps, and it had the single greatest scene with a unicorn I've ever seen). The film starred Chris Hemsworh. Yeah, I know he was in Thor, but somehow that long hair threw me off and made me not realize he was attractive.

(I think it was cause it reminded me of that one guy I don't like. But I don't know know who that one guy is right now. I want to say Sean Bean, but I like Sean Bean, and he usually doesn't have long hair. So basically I have no idea what I'm talking about.)

So then I found out that Chris Hemsworth was from Australia, and I was like, "Duh. Everybody is awesome from Australia." Hence, this blog.

I should probably stop being a freak and go back to writing. In fact, I will do that now. But I just wanted to to say, "Hey, Australia, how you doin'?" and follow it up with a Joey Tribbiani smile.

32 comments:

  1. Hey Amanda, Australia's doing pretty good ;) Hehe. I think it'd be pretty awesome if you got to come down here for a book tour or something. Just sayin' that's what you should start wishing for :P

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  2. Right back at you. Awesome, beautiful and creative.

    You would fit right in. Come visit. We may even arrange for our scary poisonous things to go hide for a while.

    'cept maybe our flying venomous sharks. You are on your own there. :)

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  3. It's snakes. Of the top 10 most poisonous, only the king cobra isn't native to Australia.

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  4. Wait-- Daniel Johns, like "Savage Garden" Daniel Johns? Because, OMG, my 16-year old emotions, if that's the case.

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    1. Daniel Jones is Savage Garden. Daniel Johns (who I was speaking of) is from Silverchair. Both are Australian, though. And I do enjoy Savage Garden. And Ch-ch-ch-cherry cola. ;)

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  5. Oh come on, what about Justine Larbalestier and Scott Westerfeld? That's an American-Australian marriage of awesome genre YA writers. (And if anyone reading this thread is not reading their books, well, you should. Now. Do it. Start with Uglies for Scott and Liar for Justine.)

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    1. There are exceptions to the rule, of course. In fact, it's probably not even a rule. It's probably something I just made up in the conspiracy theory that is my mind.

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  6. You should come! I'll lend you my kangaroo!
    @RyanSullAuthor

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  7. Yes, it's true, us Aussie's rock :D

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  8. Don't forget your adult diapers when traveling, Amanda. We all know you can't control your bowels.

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    1. Is this Lisa Rinna? Are you trying to sell me Depends again?

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    2. Good one Amanda! LOL

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  9. Hey Amanda.

    It's snakes that are the top ten most poisonous.
    I was totally excited about your blog. It's true Australia is pretty awesome although I can honestly say I have never once come across any deadly creatures in my 19 years of living here.It's a little disappointing actually.

    In saying that it's probably better we keep the whole 'Australians being bad ass' idea alive. It makes us look so cool :P

    Fun fact! Did you know Australia is the smallest continent in the world. We are also the second biggest island (after Greenland).

    I don't really know why I was so compelled to tell you that, but I have a feeling you might like fun facts.

    Also Chris is Liam Hemsworths older brother and I don't know if you have seen hunger games but he plays Gale and in my opinion is the better of the two.

    Anyway I'll stop rambling. I love you work!!

    From Jen.

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  10. Yeah Australia does have dangerous animals. I cringed after seeing several Discovery and other documentaries about their jellyfish population and people getting stung.

    Can't wait for Watersong and best of luck in writing. This blog was random but fun.

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  11. Wow, a lot of info that I didn't know! It definitely does sound like you love Australia, but it does sound like an amazing place, so I don't blame you. I'm thankful to Australia for Chris Hemsworth, because I think he makes a great Thor!

    Best,

    Alexandra~

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  12. That's great! I would love to visit Australia. Would also love to read your books, but we don't get them here :(

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  13. Australia is brilliant - as always.
    Don't let the creepy crawlies out you off. You hardly ever see them!
    Love your work Amanda - come visit us anytime :-D

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  14. Hey Amanda we would love you to come to Australia!

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  15. Hi Amanda,
    Yes, Australia is pretty awesome and also deadly. When I lived in the outback there were snakes everywhere, including my bedroom! (and I'm not talking about the trouser variety LOL)

    My book Pleasure Island is about an Australian who makes it big in Hollywood. Sorry for the shameless plug but when I saw your post on Aussie land i couldn't resist.

    You are very big in Australia, and one of the reasons (apart from your writing) is that your rise from obscurity is very inspiring and Australians love an underdog. Just make sure you don't get too big for your boots because then we'll cut you back down to size! (tall poppy syndrome)

    http://www.bookstrand.com/pleasure-island

    http://francenecarroll13.blogspot.com.au/

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  16. I'd do almost anything to get away from Australia. Swap places?

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  17. There are deadly creatures here, but they aren't as common as you would think. We just make it out to be that way so it scares all the idiots off and all the hardcore cool people come to visit.

    The fact that most Americans think Australia is in the U.K. helps us stay off the map a little I suppose. But really we're just trying to keep it to ourselves like some dirty little secret.

    Daniel Johns IS a super star!!

    Finally if you love Australia so much then you should come here. There's no excuse not to really. Just make sure you keep telling people that we ride kangaroos to school, don't wear shoes, and our spiders eat our snakes.... oh actually that IS true... have a look...

    http://www.cairns.com.au/article/2012/04/19/215081_local-news.html

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  18. Why isn't 'My Blood Approves' (book 1) available in Australia? The Kindle site says the title isn't available here =(

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  19. Why isn't 'My Blood Approves' (book 1) available in Australia? The Kindle site says the title isn't available here =(

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  20. Hi Amanda,


    I read switched a few months ago and loved it. I live in Perth Western Australi, you should treat yourself to a trip downunder, your fans would love to meet you.

    Cheers
    Nadine

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  21. Hahaha man you are hilarious! I'm an Aussie travelling abroad and I think you might be right about the Aussies marry Aussies in general rule. I've met many a nice accents while travelling but I do miss us Aussies-awesomeness. I read and loved your book before starting my travels and hope to read more of your stuff when I return home. Come Visit Australia! I don't know why this Jade wants so badly to leave Australia but I had considered before I started travelling that I might like living somewhere else, but since being abroad I can honestly say that I like to visit other countries but I want to live nowhere else but Australia.

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  22. Beautiful Amanda, if you'd like to visit Down Under, please consider being our keynote speaker at our Australian regional WriteFest event 18th May, 2013 at Bundaberg. We're a one-day writers festival and our committee's previously dreamed about hosting you, but we lack the dollars to pay for an overseas air ticket. We can, however, pay you ASA speaker rates, air fares within Australia and put you up at a beautiful beachside apartment when you visit. Please consider it. You are a fabulous writer and a truly beautiful person with an inspiring story to share. Editors and authors from Sydney and Melbourne rave about our down-to-earth, truly Australian beachside/"bush" experience. If you visit Oz, add us to your must-do list! More at www.bundywriters.com

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  23. Oooooh, I only just saw this and I agree with what someone else said, you should treat yourself to a trip to Australia, your fans would love to meet you! Perth is gorgeous, I wouldn't live anywhere else in the world despite the fact that very few bands come here! :P

    P.S. If you do visit Australia, watch out for the Drop Bears! ;)

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  24. Do it! Do it! Of course, Perth is on the other side of Australia to Brisbane, Melbourne, Sydney, but then you get to see the sun on both sides of the country. :)

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  25. Why would she be scared of Drop Bears... I'd be more scared of her imagination...

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